Two Father's Days Instead

I had comments and replies with a good friend over my school fundraising rant and got to talk with her and one of the main powers behind my daughter's Parent Teacher Organization (PTO) today.  Boy did I feel like a jerk.  Although, actually, I kind of expected to have more people rake me over the coals, I do have some teacher friends.  Maybe they're too angry.   I got the teacher appreciation week thing cleared-up, my daughter was to bring an item each day for her homeroom teacher and whatever special she had for that day, so two items, not seven.  BIG difference.  I wonder why I just assumed that my understanding, though it seemed over the top to me, was correct?  It's not like I couldn't've called my friend to check.... I just jumped straight to feeling put out.  I guess I feel so out of step with regular non-narcissistic moms that I can't judge what's a realistic expectation of parental participation.

And Then Again...Every X Is Sacred...

http://www.ncbowhunter.com/old_web/Comics.htm

Boy was I in a terrible mood when last I ranted at you. I really did feel that way though, and likely would again if I reread it now, but now I also feel a good bit chagrined because I am pretty sure that I probably really offended some friends of mine who then may not return to read this post. Sigh.

I went without really giving weight to the "well DUH" side, except to chastise myself as a hypocrite. I was all about my own individual self who wanted no additional requirements at the expense of the individuals who would be the recipients of the gap between what is budgeted for public schools and what is needed to give the level of instruction students really deserve and that we expect. How convenient.

Not to excuse this, but it occurred to me this afternoon that there is an unexpected link between this subject and my former work life in wildlife management.

LONG RANT: Really? Am I that selfish? Sigh. Yep.

http://theodoylerules.com/2010/04/30/stop-school-fundraising-now/

I can sum up this post in two words:

I suck.

First, I am having a problem with my emotions not agreeing to be OK with the decisions made by my executive functions.

Saturday was my day off for years. But this spring my daughter is doing soccer. My husband is coaching. He is an excellent father. They have games on Saturday mornings. This means that I need to watch my three-year-old son and we should obviously attend the games and cheer our team. Fine. I say that's OK and agreed that Sunday could be my morning to sleep in. Fine. I really am intellectually OK with this. It's completely fair. Well, my emotional self is not. She is resentful and annoyed and sulky. When it means she has to get up early, she is angry. She resents the intrusion into the pattern that she was happy with. I don't like her. I try to reject these emotions but that is not making them go away.